By Nothando Mdhluli
Since the dawn of democracy in 1994, South Africa has made remarkable strides in advancing constitutional rights, widening access to education and healthcare, extending social protection, and opening doors for millions who were excluded under apartheid.
Yet, as the nation continues this journey, the importance of strong, supportive and resilient families has become increasingly evident. Crime, gender-based violence, substance abuse, child neglect and domestic violence threaten not only the safety and wellbeing of individuals, but also the social progress South Africa has worked so hard to achieve.
This then raises a troubling question: in the face of these challenges, are we losing the moral fibre that strong families once gave our society?
For generations, the family has been at the heart of African life, offering belonging, learning, protection and shared responsibility. In many communities, the day once closed with families and elders gathered around the fire, sharing stories, passing down traditions and teaching lessons of respect, courage, kindness and community.
Roles within the household were often distinct. Men commonly hunted, protected the home and provided for its needs, while women nurtured children, prepared food, preserved cultural knowledge and sustained the household. Around them stood a wider circle of relatives and neighbours, where caring for children and supporting families in hard times were understood as collective duties.
Over time, however, this web of support has come under strain. Apartheid-era policies such as migrant labour and forced removals separated fathers from households and communities from their ancestral land, weakening the bonds that once held families together. Today, urbanisation, long working hours, financial pressure and the pull of social media and technology continue to stretch families thin. Young people without guidance or a sense of belonging are more vulnerable to gangs and substance abuse. As generations drift apart, the stories, values and traditions that teach respect and responsibility are passed down less and less.
This calls on us to reconnect with our values and recognise the fundamental role that families play in nurturing responsible citizens and building a capable nation.
The family is where character is first formed. Within the family, children first learn the difference between right and wrong, develop respect for others, understand accountability, and discover the importance of treating every person with dignity. With guidance from parents, grandparents, and other relatives, they learn the foundations of leadership: take responsibility for their actions, make considered decisions, show compassion, and stand up for what is right.
These lessons do not stay in childhood. They go with a person into adulthood, influencing how they work, handle conflict and raise their own children. Families also remain a source of protection and belonging throughout life, a place to return to in times of loss, failure or uncertainty. Above all, the family is where the spirit of Ubuntu, the understanding that our humanity is bound to the humanity of others, is nurtured through everyday acts of kindness, sharing, respect and care. When these values are lived at home, they reach beyond the household, guiding how people engage with their neighbours, take part in their communities and meaningfully contribute to society.
Rebuilding and protecting the family system is an important part of addressing the social ills confronting South Africa. While strong families alone cannot eradicate crime, gender-based violence, substance abuse and other social challenges, they can help address some of the underlying factors that allow these problems to persist. This requires us to look beyond the family as an individual household and recognise the importance of the wider ecosystem that sustains it, including communities, schools, social services and other institutions. By investing in this interconnected system of care and support, we help create an environment in which positive values are reinforced.
Recognising the central role of families in building a cohesive society, Government has developed the Revised White Paper on Families as a policy framework to guide family strengthening, preservation and support. The White Paper acknowledges that families are shaped by the social and economic environments in which they live and that their wellbeing requires a coordinated response across sectors.
This commitment is backed by practical interventions: social grants, such as the Child Support and Older Persons grants, that cushion low-income households; no-fee schools and school nutrition programmes that ease the cost of raising children; parenting and family preservation services offered through social development; and national strategies to combat gender-based violence and substance abuse.
Yet government cannot build resilient families alone. Lasting change depends on parents, communities, schools and faith groups carrying these commitments into everyday life.
South Africa’s democracy gave us a constitution founded on dignity, equality and freedom, but a constitution can only live where people practise those values, and most people first learn them at home. Laws, policies and programmes can open doors, yet it is families, supported by schools, faith communities, neighbours and government, who prepare people to walk through them.
Although family structures and roles have changed across cultures and generations, the spirit of Ubuntu, our shared humanity and responsibility for one another, remains our greatest inheritance and our most practical guide. Rebuilding that spirit is a task for every South African: parents who guide, elders who share their wisdom, communities who look out for every child, and leaders who turn commitments into action. If we are to build a safer, more caring and more cohesive nation, the work must begin where it always has: at the family table.
*Mdhluli is Director: Communication Resource Centre at the Government Communication and Information System
Source: Original report at SAnews.gov.za.
